Has anybody slid this cringey cold email template into your inbox lately?
Goes a little like this…
yoo Nicholas
just watched your video on “Dust off that old email list” .. it’s just pure solid value.
I’ve just designed a funnel website for you to get you more CLIENTS for your OFFER.
Can I share it with u here?
you can throw my funnel in the trash if you don’t like it aha – just joking 😜
This isn’t a one-off, either. This is just 1 of 3 emails I’ve gotten using the same “tEmPlAtE” this week.
Man oh man…where do I even start?
First of all…
Would you reply to this email?
…
No, right?
If you’re like most people, you’d rather report it as spam…and then NEVER think about it again.
But…
If we reverse-engineer this email, we can see almost a dozen individual, reader-repulsing no-no’s…and if you look hard enough, you just might notice that your business is making a few of these mistakes, too.
Yes, you too. You there, in the back.
Here’s one of the mistakes…
Using a template in the first place.
Look:
<Salutation> <Name>
Just <Action related to your content> on <topic>, and it’s packed with value!
<Pitch, totally unrelated to the previous line>
Can I share it with you here?
You can throw my funnel in the trash if you don’t like it blah blah…
We can all agree that this sucks, but there are a bunch of psychological principles nestled in these lines—the writer is just doing a piss-poor job using them.
That’s the main problem with templates…if you don’t understand why the original worked, you can’t adapt the “script” to new situations.
Which is why this email went straight into the trash can.
Right now, you’re probably thinking…
“I don’t use templates in my business.”
But really?
You probably are.
Maybe not as obviously as this cold email.
But most businesses make the same “type” of mistakes.
I’ll do a line-by-line video breakdown of these cheap “parlor tricks” soon—and how you can use them CORRECTLY to get more customers.
For now, you’ll have to content yourself with all these videos instead.
Mr. “PuRe SoLiD VaLuE,”
Nick
