What do cookies and milk have to do with escaping bad business deals, making more money, and avoiding freelancer hell?
…
You tell me.
Maybe I’m making this whole thing up. Maybe there’s no connection at all. Maybe I just wanted an excuse to talk about cookies.
But stick with me, and you’ll see why every freelancer needs to master “Cookies ‘n’ Milk” negotiation tactics—or risk getting their time and energy sucked dry.
Let’s start with this all-too-common freelancer horror story…
“Scope creep is real.”
A frustrated freelancer on Reddit recently vented:
“I agreed to a $560 project, but after endless add-ons, I’ve done $1,000 worth of work. If I close the contract, I risk not getting paid AND a bad review. Ever dealt with this?”
Ever dealt with this?
Yeah, of course you have. Every freelancer has.
Because this isn’t just about one bad client.
This is psychology.
And this little freelancer nightmare is a perfect case study in two of my favorite psychological principles:
- Sunk Cost Fallacy
- Foot-In-The-Door Technique
Let’s break ‘em down.
Sunk Cost Fallacy: The Reason People Stay Stuck
Ever seen a gambler hammering a slot machine, convinced that one more pull will get them back to even?
They’ve already lost thousands. They know they should walk away. But…they can’t.
Because walking away means admitting they wasted all that time and money.
This is the Sunk Cost Fallacy in action.
The brain hates admitting failure. It convinces you that throwing even more time, energy, and resources into a bad decision is somehow better than cutting your losses.
Which is exactly what happens with bad freelance contracts.
- You already put in 10 extra hours? What’s another 2?
- You already wrote two extra blog posts for free? What’s one more?
- You already caved on their extra requests? Might as well keep the client happy!
And before you know it…
You’re overworked, underpaid, and completely resentful of your own business.
Which brings us to cookies and milk.
“If You Give a Client a Cookie…”
When I was a kid, one of my favorite books was If You Give a Mouse a Cookie.
If you’ve never read it, here’s the premise:
- If you give a mouse a cookie…
- He’s going to ask for a glass of milk.
- If you give him milk…
- He’s going to ask for a straw.
- If you give him a straw…
- He’s going to want a napkin…
And so on, until the mouse has moved into your house, stolen your credit card, and drained your 401(k).
(Okay, I might be paraphrasing, but you get the idea.)
The lesson?
When you don’t set boundaries, small requests turn into never-ending demands.
Freelancers who let clients get away with “just one more thing” are basically feeding a freeloading mouse.
And that brings us to the Foot-In-The-Door Technique.
How Clients Manipulate You With “Small” Requests
The Foot-In-The-Door technique is one of the most common sales psychology tricks.
It works like this:
- Get someone to agree to a small request.
- Once they say yes, they’re psychologically more likely to agree to a bigger one.
Salespeople use it all the time.
- “Just take a free sample!” → You feel obligated to buy.
- “Just sign up for a free trial!” → Suddenly you’re on a $49/month plan.
- “Just answer a quick question!” → Now they’re pitching you a $10,000 service.
Bad clients do the same thing.
- “Can you tweak this one thing?” (Sure!)
- “Since you’re already in there, could you add a second version?” (Okay…)
- “Hey, while you’re at it, could you do 10 more?” (…Wait a minute.)
This is how scope creep happens.
Once you’ve said yes a few times, you feel trapped.
You don’t want to be difficult. You don’t want a bad review. You just want to get paid.
And before you know it, you’re drowning in unpaid work.
How to Stop Getting Steamrolled by Clients
If you want to stop being the free cookie dispenser for time-sucking clients, you need to set firm boundaries from the start.
This means:
- Being ultra-clear on scope – If it’s not in the contract, it costs extra. Period.
- Having a process for add-ons – Extra work = extra payment. No exceptions.
- Not being afraid to walk away – Bad clients aren’t worth the stress.
- Pre-screening clients better – Red flags upfront? Run.
Most freelancers never master this.
They stay stuck in reactive mode—putting out fires instead of controlling their own business.
But there are actually 5 major red flags that tell you before a project even starts whether a client is going to drain your time, energy, and wallet.
I know, because I dealt with dozens of these “time vampires” when I started freelancing 11 years ago.
Knowing these 5 signs will save you dozens of wasted hours and thousands of dollars in unpaid work.
Act now, and keep grabby client hands out of your cookie jar.
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