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| April 22, 2025 Wake up once at 4:27 am with a crying baby and no coffee beans in the cupboard? Shame on you. Wake up twice with no coffee beans? Shame on me. Last week I swore an oath to my wife that this house would never go uncaffeinated again. And so I demanded pounds upon pounds of […]
Client management secrets of a Canadian coffee king Read More »
| April 22, 2025 Let this be a warning to anyone reading their inbox too early in the morning. Last night, I got what may be the most seductive cold pitch I’ve seen all year. It wasn’t a bullet list.It wasn’t AI-generated fluff.It was… a poem. An actual poem. Here’s what it said: “Dear sir, your YouTube channel,80/20 MarketingIs
How to not close sales—a haiku Read More »
| April 22, 2025 Last night I was drifting off to sleep, just about to hit that REM cycle when suddenly… Out of nowhere… Jack and Jill,Sitting in a tree,K-I-S-S-I-N-G… I jolted awake like a squirrel on espresso. I haven’t heard that rhyme in 20+ years. So why was my brain unearthing it now? Why not something useful? Like
Your Brain Is A Liar Read More »
| April 22, 2025 “We dumped another $10K in the trash.” Gus was heated. So heated, in fact, that his webcam started to fog up on our Zoom call. “How many months have we f—ed up the same s—t!? I told you NOT to target Boise!” He took a dramatic sip of water like he was trying to rinse
How to Set $10,000 on Fire With One Dumb PPC Mistake Read More »
| April 22, 2025 “It would be a miracle if we got any deals from marketing this year.” That’s what my client Steve told me, half-laughing, half-praying. And honestly?He had every reason to be cynical. Steve runs an outsourcing firm. A couple years back, his business was booming—purely off referrals. Clients were thrilled. Word spread. Life was good. He
Are You Accidentally “Blogging About Bread?” Read More »
| April 22, 2025 “Needs fewer fingers,” I told my client, squinting at the new product image. He blinked. “What do you mean?” I circled the hand on the screen. Six fingers. Maybe seven. A grotesque mockup of a phone grasped by what looked like a human-but-not-human creature. Ah yes. Another MidJourney masterpiece. We were on a Zoom call,
The Problem With AI Freelancers Read More »
| March 20, 2025 “Nobody wants your spam emails!!” Wailed the 71-year-old commenter on one of my recent YouTube videos about reviving dead email lists. “Yes, they do!” …I’d argue. Successfully. Because I wasn’t talking about cold emails—the ones undoubtedly stuffing Abe Simpson’s inbox with promises of credit repair and lost Aztec gold buried beneath his shrubbery. I was
Old man yells at video Read More »
| March 20, 2025 Late last night, my wife Nhu and I hurried through the dim grocery store parking lot on our undying quest for eggs. Eerie quiet, except for the wail of a police siren in the distance. “I hope there’s not a killer on the loose tonight,” I whispered in my wife’s ear as we shuffled through
Stalked by the “Cart Corral Killer” Read More »
| March 20, 2025 A frequent reader told me this recently: “Your emails look kinda like spam. You know, no pictures. Plain formatting. Shouldn’t you have a business logo or something?” He was immediately banned from my email list, blocked from rejoining, and naturally, his passport was revoked. (Or was he?) Of course not, but I thought his comment
Your emails look like spam—here’s why mine don’t Read More »
| March 19, 2025 What ever happened to that Google lawsuit? You know the one. The one where everyone realized… “Oh yeah…Google owns the air you breathe, and you can’t whisper a single cheeky word of ‘pillow talk’ without Alphabet serving you lingerie ads the next morning while you’re standing in line at Starbucks.” That one. Apparently, it’s still
Time to break up (Google) Read More »