Nicholas Bandy

“Honey, Animal Crossing is back on the menu!” I yelled, kicking open our bedroom door, clutching my laptop like it contained the lost secrets of the universe. Nhu, my wife, stood there gripping an electric toothbrush like a nunchuk, caught mid-motion, looking like a deer in the headlights. “Shush, I just put Nora back to

I’ve been playing with my wife’s anniversary present for two days straight. Took some getting used to at first… Apply too much pressure, and it makes a mess. Not enough pressure? Dry as a Mormon bachelorette party. But when you hit it just right? “Honey, I’m going to make a joke about this pen ‘soaking

Last night, sitting at our kitchen island: “Get your damn act together! Ha!” I muttered to my phone. “Classic.” “Excuse me?” my wife shot, looking up from the stove and her bubbling cauldron of chicken soup. “Oh, uh…” I put my phone down and pointed at the screen. “Just got one of the best email

A couple of days ago, I mentioned Boomerang Logic—the ancient, mystical art of stealing good ideas from other industries and bastardizing them into something useful for your own business. I gave the example of a mortgage company client who had a boring, lifeless landing page with a single input box. So I stole a better

Yesterday, one of your fellow cultists—er, readers—wrote in with trembling hands: Lol yes I can, Debbie. Let’s talk about Bill. “Gotta Reschedule, Car Got Stolen” A few days ago, I was supposed to hop on a sales call with Bill. (Y’all can call it an onboarding call, a discovery call, whatever. I call it what

This morning with my daughter, Nora, was an absolute blast. By “blast,” I mean a relentless assault of wailing, clapping, and desperate attempts to keep the peace through song. 🎶 “The wheels on the bus go round and round!” 👏 Clap. Clap. Clap. 🚨 “WWWAAAAAaaahhhh!” 🎶 “There was a farmer had a dog, E-I-E-I-O!” 👏

Scroll through LinkedIn or Reddit on any given day, and you’ll see the same complaints on repeat: Freelancers: “I can’t find clients who don’t flake, underpay, and micromanage.”Businesses: “I can’t find freelancers who don’t flake, overcharge, and underdeliver.” Or put another way… “It’s impossible to find good work right now!”“It’s impossible to find good people

I was eating lunch with my wife earlier, trying to have a halfway decent conversation while baby Nora babbled away in her bassinet. Between bites, my wife hit me with an interrogation: “Why didn’t you tell them about Schiphol?” “What? Watch your language in front of Nora,” I said, feigning offense. “And what are you

Last night, standing in line at CVS trying to get tummy meds for my baby, I witnessed an absolute masterclass in communication breakdown. A young pharmacy clerk—let’s call him Broccoli Boy—instructed a customer:“Take two by mouth now, then take two twice per day as needed.” The customer, a man in Crocs and winter shorts (because

Yesterday I talked to y’all about product research. Missed it? Go here: When To Take Drugs For Your Clients TLDR? I chewed caffeine gum and wrote about the experience for a client. Well, I kinda framed it like I got paid to take drugs…I mean, caffeine is a drug right? I posted yesterday’s email in